By Ben D’Ray

Strict school rules are meant to create order — but are they doing more harm than good? Drawing on personal experience, teacher insights, and national data, this piece explores whether harsh discipline policies are helping students thrive or simply pushing them out.

As a student who left secondary education just a year ago, I’ve since questioned why my school was so strict. I’ve always suspected I was getting unfair sanctions and often wondered why? Imagine this. I was in the corridor and my shirt untucked, as shirts do. For this I received an hour’s detention. Another time I was off sick so didn’t receive some homework which I was later punished for not doing.

It felt unfair, arbitrary and counterproductive. While I recognize that schools do need rules, and do need ways to enforce it, the rules can lead to detrimental impacts such as poor grades, bad relationships with teachers, and ultimately an unhappy school career.

Data indicates a significant increase in the use of strict discipline measures in schools. For instance, according to the Department of Education own figures, between 2018-2019 and 2022-2023, the number of schools suspending over 25% of their pupils doubled from 24 to 50. During this period, approximately 257,000 students were suspended at least once, with disadvantaged schools seeing suspension rates three times higher than wealthier areas.

Discipline policies have become stricter due to a combination of pandemic-related behavioural decline, pressure to improve academic outcomes, increased control by academy trusts, government support for tougher measures, and wider social influences.

While these policies may improve order, there’s growing debate about whether they harm student wellbeing — especially for those who need emotional support or alternative approaches.

Are schools helping students succeed, or pushing them away with strict rules and harsh consequences? It’s a question many students and teachers are starting to ask. I spoke with James Cottee — a secondary school teacher and faculty leader with nearly ten years of experience — about how school discipline is applied and how it really affects students.

Cottee acknowledges that structure is important in a school environment.

“Rules are clear and consistent. From Year 7, students know what’s expected, and those expectations are repeated year after year,” he explains.

This structure creates fairness, in his view, because students understand the consequences of their actions. However, he’s also quick to point out that fairness doesn’t always mean it works the same for everyone.

“Some students need a different approach. If I had come into your class shouting and laying down the rules with no relationship, I wouldn’t get anything out of you,” Cottee says. “What works is building mutual respect, not just punishment.”

Cottee believes newer teachers often feel pressured to stick rigidly to behaviour policies — especially under academy trusts. When his school was taken over by a trust, the rules became much stricter.

“There’s this one-size-fits-all behaviour policy that every teacher is expected to follow,” he says. “It helps with order, but it doesn’t leave much space to teach in your own way or meet individual needs.”

While the stricter rules have improved things like attendance and lesson disruption, Cottee says it can come at a cost — particularly for students who struggle with authority or feel disconnected from school life.

“Yes, they broke a rule. But we need to ask — is this helping them improve, or just pushing them away further?”

A survey by YoungMinds, a charity that advocates for better mental health provision for young people, found that 1 in 3 students said that the pressure of school led them to feel disconnected or isolated. A 2019 survey they conducted found that 67% of secondary school students reported feeling stressed because of schoolwork, and 42% said they experienced anxiety due to academic pressure.

A 2020 study by the Education Policy Institute, an education think-tank, revealed that 75% of students who experienced mental health issues said their condition had worsened because of school-related stressors.

Despite being someone who comes across as energetic and upbeat, these statistics do not surprise me at all. I’ve always thought it was like I was in the Hunger Games, a Zero-Sum game where we were pitched against each other, rather than us all being risen together.

Alexia Truman, is an ex-secondary school student who left secondary school due to feeling uncomfortable with how “teachers turned a blind eye” to her

She dropped out of school and tried the homeschool route. She really liked the benefit of selecting her own hours to work but this did lead her to being left unmotivated “I lost my routine. It became very isolating”.

She then found out that she could do her GCSES at a Nottingham College. She expressed that going to college was 100% better than going to a secondary school. She stated that she was able to express herself freely and they really did something about someone’s behaviour which she was seeking her secondary school to do instead of turning that “blind eye”.

“You really feel free. The teachers care and can have a laugh with students and teach at the same time”

Back in conventional schools, one of the more controversial issues is the use of isolation rooms, where students are removed from class and made to sit in silence all day. Cottee explain this approach often does more harm than good.

“Rules help with order, but relationships are what change behaviour.”

“It can seriously drain you mentally. It makes students feel like they don’t belong at school,” he says. “Yes, they broke a rule. But we need to ask — is this helping them improve, or just pushing them away further?”

For some students, he explains, especially those who are already struggling, detentions and isolation can increase feelings of frustration and injustice rather than encourage better behaviour.

Cottee believes schools do aim to help students, but not all policies work equally well for everyone.

“Most schools want the best for students. But the truth is, not every student fits into the same box. And those who don’t — those who need something different — sometimes get left behind.”

He reflects on how some students are misunderstood or not given the right kind of support, which can lead to long-term disengagement.

So, are schools too strict? Cottee believes the answer depends on how those rules are applied.

“We need high expectations, absolutely. But we also need to know our students. Rules help with order, but relationships are what change behaviour.”

In other words, being strict can help — but only when combined with empathy, flexibility, and an understanding of each student’s individual needs, but are they really prioritising the right topic.

Regarding teachers at my school, I never thought they considered my feelings, and it felt like it was a battle just to keep myself out of a detention, never mind putting all my effort into revising for my GCSES.

My grades were decent when I left secondary school but could have been better if I could have focused on them, instead of serving hours of pointless automatic system detentions.

What did I benefit from doing the detention? I’m not allowed to do homework, talk, or look around. It was dead time.

Why does it feel like I’m in prison because I got caught with my shirt untucked or being a minute late to a lesson due to a 6-minute walk from one class to another during a 5-minute movement time?

What do you want me to do? Run across school to get to class? Or would i be sanctioned with another detention for breaking another rule of no running?

I understand that discipline is essential in schools — it sets boundaries, maintains order, and creates an environment where learning can take place. But from my own experience and from the voices of others I’ve spoken to, it’s clear that the current systems in many schools often lack flexibility, compassion, and a sense of fairness. When discipline becomes automatic and unforgiving, it stops being about support and starts feeling like control.

What’s missing is balance. Yes, students need to know what’s expected of them, but they also need to feel heard, respected, and understood. Strict rules without context or empathy don’t create better students — they create resentment, disconnection, and stress. If we want schools to truly help young people grow, succeed, and stay engaged, then discipline policies need to evolve (Letting us do homework in detentions would be a good start).

Education shouldn’t feel like a battle or a punishment. It should feel like a place of opportunity. If we can shift the focus from rigid enforcement to real connection, we might just see students rise — not out of fear, but from feeling supported.